The silence spoke louder than any words. When Jamie Laing crossed the finish line of his 150-mile Comic Relief marathon in Manchester in March 2024, the crowd cheered — but one face was missing. Spencer Matthews, his former Made in Chelsea co-star and once-close friend, didn’t show up. Not because he was sick. Not because he was busy. But because, as Matthews later said plainly: "I wasn’t invited." That single sentence, dropped in a candid podcast interview, cracked open a two-year rift between two of British reality TV’s most recognizable faces.
The Stag Do That Broke the Friendship
The fracture didn’t start with the marathon. It started with a party. In late 2022, as Jamie Laing prepared to marry Sophie Habboo, he invited his closest friends to his bachelor party. Spencer Matthews, who’d been sober since 2018, declined. To him, it was simple: "It’s no big deal." He wasn’t rejecting Laing — he was honoring his own boundaries. But Laing, sensitive by nature and deeply invested in social rituals, saw it differently. He felt abandoned. Disrespected. The sting lingered. And when Matthews didn’t attend the wedding in 2023 — another event where close friends were expected — the silence became a chasm."You saw it as insulting and I didn’t," Matthews admitted later. "And then I think we just lost a bit of touch."
The Marathon That Made It Public
Laing’s 150-mile run — completed over five grueling days in March 2024 — wasn’t just a charity effort. It was a personal statement. He raised exactly £2,053,835 for Comic Relief, a cause he’d championed for years. Dozens of Made in Chelsea alumni showed up in Manchester to cheer him on: Oliver Proudlock, Mark-Francis Vandelli, even former flame Tiff Watson. But Matthews? No sign. Not a tweet. Not a comment. Not a car parked outside the finish line.When asked why, Matthews didn’t deflect. "Had I come to support you, I wouldn’t have just driven to Manchester and hoped to see you guys," he said. "The BBC invited him. You don’t just turn up." His tone wasn’t angry — it was weary. Like someone who’d been waiting for a call that never came.
Laing’s response was quiet, almost gentle. "At the finish line, loads of people did turn up, but I also totally get you and I weren’t as friendly at the time. So, in our relationship here, if I wasn’t as friendly with you and you weren’t as friendly with me, then why would you turn up? We weren’t talking as much."
The Quiet Reconciliation
The real turning point didn’t happen on a racecourse. It happened in a recording studio.In mid-2024, Matthews appeared as a guest on Laing’s podcast, Great Company. They didn’t rehearse. They didn’t script it. They just talked — about sobriety, about pride, about how easily friendships slip away when you stop checking in. The episode, titled "Why We Stopped Talking," went viral. Fans flooded Instagram. The untapped.podcast account posted a reel on September 23, 2025, titled "The truth about Jamie & Spencer’s fallout," which racked up nearly 4,000 likes and over 2,000 comments. People cared. Because they’d watched these two grow up on TV.
Laing, with 1.2 million Instagram followers, has always been the more emotionally visible of the two. Matthews, with 950,000, is quieter — but no less affected. An old Instagram message from Laing, posted before the fallout went public, called Matthews "someone who’s been through hell and still shows up." That line stuck with fans. It made the silence harder to swallow.
Why This Matters Beyond Reality TV
This isn’t just about two guys who used to drink champagne on yachts in Ibiza. It’s about how modern friendships survive — or don’t — in the age of curated lives and unspoken expectations. Matthews chose sobriety. Laing chose inclusion. Neither was wrong. But neither fully understood the other’s world.What’s rare here is the honesty. Most celebrity feuds end in PR statements or passive-aggressive Instagram stories. This one ended with two men sitting in a studio, admitting they’d let pride get in the way of care. That’s not just relatable — it’s revolutionary.
There’s no grand press release. No joint interview. But the silence has changed. Matthews followed Laing’s Instagram again. Laing liked a photo of Matthews’ wellness brand, Cleanmarine. Small things. But in a world where friendships are measured in likes and DMs, these gestures carry weight.
What’s Next?
The next step? Maybe a coffee in London. Maybe a joint charity initiative. Maybe nothing at all — and that’s okay too. Some friendships don’t need to return to how they were. They just need to find a new way to exist.What’s clear is this: both men are different now. Matthews, sober and focused on mental health. Laing, a husband and father, more grounded than the party-boy persona he once played on TV. Their story isn’t about betrayal. It’s about growth. And sometimes, growth means letting go — not of the person, but of the version of them you thought they’d always be.
Frequently Asked Questions
Why didn’t Spencer Matthews attend Jamie Laing’s stag do?
Spencer Matthews declined the invitation because he had been sober since 2018 and didn’t feel comfortable attending a party centered around alcohol. He viewed it as a personal boundary, not a rejection — but Jamie Laing interpreted it as a personal slight, which deepened their growing distance.
How much money did Jamie Laing raise for Comic Relief?
Jamie Laing raised exactly £2,053,835 during his 150-mile marathon challenge across five days in March 2024 in Manchester. The effort was one of the most successful individual fundraising campaigns for Comic Relief that year, drawing widespread media attention and support from former Made in Chelsea cast members.
Did Spencer Matthews attend Jamie Laing’s wedding?
No, Spencer Matthews did not attend Jamie Laing’s wedding to Sophie Habboo in 2023. His absence, alongside his non-appearance at the marathon, confirmed to fans that their friendship had significantly deteriorated since the stag do incident in late 2022.
How did their relationship begin to mend?
Their reconciliation began when Spencer Matthews appeared as a guest on Jamie Laing’s podcast, Great Company, in mid-2024. They spoke openly about their communication breakdown, with Matthews acknowledging his perspective and Laing admitting he took the stag do refusal personally. The candid conversation resonated with fans and signaled a quiet thaw.
Are Spencer Matthews and Jamie Laing friends again?
They’re not publicly calling each other "best friends" again, but the hostility has dissolved. Small social media gestures — likes, follows, shared posts — suggest mutual respect has returned. Whether their friendship fully rebuilds remains to be seen, but the door is no longer closed.
What role did social media play in this fallout?
Social media amplified every silence. When Matthews didn’t post about the marathon or wedding, fans assumed the worst. When Laing posted photos of others at the finish line, the absence was glaring. In an age where presence equals loyalty, their lack of digital interaction became a public indictment — even though their real-world communication had already faded.